To My Friends: Living Eulogies
After posting my funeral plans last week, I started thinking about eulogies. Generally, eulogies are celebratory speeches about a person who has recently died. Wouldn’t you much rather be able to hear what your friends have to say about you, though? There is no reason I should wait until my friends are dead to say how wonderful they are. They are a huge part of my life, and I’m really grateful to know them.
Obviously I can’t write a eulogy for everyone I love right now, but I might do a part two series. I made myself narrow the list down (in no order). I love you all. And I encourage you to write your own list of living eulogies to the people who matter the most to you.
It’s hard to believe I’ve known you for two years. On one hand, seeing your archived posts from 2012 and realizing I was around for that seems unreal, and on the other I don’t know how I’ve gone so long without you. I knew when I found you that you were a keeper, and I’m so glad you’ve felt the same. I appreciate your experimental nature and dedication to creativity and education. You have a very non-judgmental nature, which is rare to find. You know what you like in life, and you keep it around. You have a wonderful self awareness, as well as a great understanding of humanity and the world in general. I might not get to see you very often, but when I do it makes up for lost time. You have given me some of the most thoughtful gifts I’ve ever received. Topping the list is when you changed the lyrics to “The Middle” for me, at a time when you knew what I needed.
The fact that we didn’t really connect until you moved across the country will always make me sad, but the point is that we did connect. I still remember our first e-mail exchanges as the time I fell in love with you, and I’ve stayed in love ever since. You’re someone who I’m very comfortable with automatically. I don’t feel pressured to fill silences with you, which isn’t something you can have with everyone. You have shown so much motivation and gumption in your life, and I’m continually proud of you. Your love of weird things, some of which I understand and some I don’t, makes me crush on you over and over. You have the patience and dedicated nature that I can only be envious of. You are going to be the best nurse in the entire country, and I can’t wait for you to know it.
It’s been forever, girl. And I’m glad. You have more photographic evidence of friendship with me than anyone else, and there’s a reason for that. You’ve always embraced my wild side by bringing your own to the table, and I’m eternally grateful for that. We may have slightly switched roles at this point in life, but maybe that’s the universes way of maintaining balance. I couldn’t be more proud of you and the choices you’ve made in the past year. My favorite thing, though, is that no matter how professional and stable you become as your version of an adult, we can still sing our hearts out in a potentially embarrassing fashion. You have always been a very accepting, forgiving, and non-materialistic person. I’m gonna keep you around, and it’s for more than just your Bonnie Tyler performances.
I know you don’t believe me, but I really did think you were the coolest girl in high school. Being at the point where you can wipe my nose and we can finish each other’s stories is really fucking cool to me. You have an incredibly interesting mind, and I’m always up for an extensive talk with you about life. You go after what you want, and I can’t tell you how much I love that. You make my life more fun, and that’s because of the way you live. You’re outgoing in a beautiful way, but you also have a soft soul that feels like art. Thanks for leaving your comfort zone in terms of confetti, and giving me great memories.
I obviously wish we were closer geographically, but your presence makes its way to me regularly without the need for an airplane. Your words and spirit have provided me with much comfort in sadder times, and have elevated me to an infinite status when I was already feeling well. Your mermaidness will live on for eternity because of the beauty you have brought to this earth in the way of aluminum foil, list poetry, and emotional kinesthetics. You’re an artist to your core, but also a nomad who will spread her joy to anyone she encounters.
I’m so glad our paths crossed, because I think we have a lot to offer each other…especially you to me. You have shown me just how possible it is to create social situations that aren’t boring. I really admire the way you are able to maintain your interests without a second thought to the mainstream. You’re a born leader who celebrates life with vigor. I hope you never lose your vital creativity or desire to play. Thank you for teaching me so many things already, and for how you include everyone in your adventures.
I’ve only met you one time, but I’ve felt a connection to you for years. Your letters have made me laugh, cry, and clutch them to my chest with a feeling of hope. Your desire for equality in this world is a beautiful thing, and I really love the way we can identify on issues of humanity. I admire your confidence and comfort within yourself. You have a very loving nature, and I appreciate that you will always be yourself, full out, with no questions or apologies. You go after experiences, not stories, and you deserve ultimate joy.
I can’t tell you how glad I am I met you. You’re everything I want in a friend, and sometimes it feels surreal just to be in your presence. I’m continually overwhelmed with the way you live your life. You’re not only the most fun person I know, but you’re also incredibly generous: you share the fun you think up with anyone who will listen. Your taste in absolutely everything is remarkable, and I think I finally understand the term “kindred spirits” after meeting you. Your talents are extensive, bold, and beautiful, but you also have a very calming presence about you. You’re who I want to be.
Your entry into my life marked the beginning of me living, for which I can never express enough gratitude. You showed me so much about what it’s like to have unconditional friendship, and I’m glad you stuck around. You’re silly, fun, and talented. Sure, the amount of equations on your whiteboards makes me feel like I’m in A Beautiful Mind, but it also reminds me how intelligent you are. (#BootyDoMath) You’ve done things as they’ve made sense for you, and that’s a good thing to be able to do. Thanks for always being there to listen, but more for always being welcoming of me in your life and reminding me where I came from.