I did a fun little prank in my driveway. I staged a unicorn murder. It’s only fun because it’s fake. An actual unicorn getting murdered is not cool. Unicorns are majestic beasts that deserve to live long and beautiful lives.

[Some background information: A new family moved into the house next door with a bunch of kids. I hadn’t interacted with anyone yet.]

I went to my driveway, drew an outline of a unicorn, and surrounded the area with caution tape. My dad came out to see what I was doing, and that attracted the man from next door. He came over and my dad introduced us.

Man: “Hi Mary, how are you?”
Me: “I’ve been better. A unicorn died here today.”

He left soon after.

I took a picture using flash, and two little girls ran out.

Little Girl 1: “Do you need help finding anything?”
Me: “Not that I know of.”
Little Girl 2: “What happened?”
Me: “It’s just a sad day. A unicorn is dead.”
Little Girl 1: “Did you draw that?”
Me: “Yes. Around the body. Where exactly were you around 6 pm?”
Little Girl 1: “At home.”
Me: “Right there?” *points* “That’s awfully close to the crime scene, wouldn’t you say?”
Little Girl 1: “I guess…”
Little Girl 2: “I WAS AT SCHOOL!”
Me: “We’ll just see when I get the results back from the coroner.”
Dad: “Yeah!”

After they went back inside I threw my dress’ train behind me and said, “This is a crime scene. Treat it as such.”

I stayed in character for over an hour. And those people are probably going to move.
(I’m REALLY good with kids.)

I should mention that I also walked around the crime scene, investigating the clues, using my snarfblat. It’s actually been helping me think. I have it in my mouth as I’m typing this.

“Something sinister is going on here. If you see anyone, or parts of anyone, scream. And scream again.”