We are all semi-skilled at accepting the challenges in life and seeking out solutions to problems that arise, but sometimes the curve ball that life throws at you hits you right in the face! Why is it that you can’t predetermine what will send you off kilter? It’s not just major life events; it can be a throwaway comment or a minor misunderstanding that can truly make you question your inner self.

At these times, it is important that you show compassion to yourself. Would you talk to a friend in need in the same way you talk to yourself? Here are four ways to practice self-love.

Be Mindful

You will hopefully already be familiar with the terms mindful and mindfulness. They have been very much in the public domain, but what do they mean? Being mindful means being aware of your feelings, your emotions and your surroundings. It means paying attention to everything that you do, even the most mundane parts of your routine.

Mindfulness takes practice, but once you acknowledge the sensations that you experience, you will absorb new details that were previously unnoticed. You will be able to differentiate between your likes and dislikes but also the value that your actions and communications bring to your life. You will then be able to react to situations, even stressful ones, by following the best course of action for you.

Change The Language That You Use

The language that you use every day can impact how you feel about yourself. Make a conscious effort to re-frame situations in more positive language. For example, rather than saying that you don’t have time for something, try saying that you have not prioritized it. This simple switch turns a negative into an opportunity for positive action to be taken.

Embrace New Habits

To actively promote self-love, you will more than likely have to change some of your life learnt habits. Give yourself a couple of months to form a new habit, because it’s not going to be an overnight success! Now that you are developing a mindful approach to everything that you do, you can identify activities that will help you on your journey. Yoga and tai-chi are great ways to connect your mind and body in a relaxed and healing environment. You can find local groups at sites such as HulaHub.com, which will guide you through the techniques and allow you to meet new people on a similar journey of self-love and care.


An important aspect of self-love is learning to forgive yourself for past decisions. There is no benefit to be had by beating yourself up. Part of self-love is recognizing that you will make mistakes because they are part of the human condition; we are all imperfect. There is no such thing as failure if you learn a lesson from each mistake!

As you become more practiced at self-love, you will find that all areas of your life improve. You will develop the confidence to set boundaries in situations and distance yourself from people that negatively affect you, enabling you to actively limit their influence. Self-love is an inbuilt form of strengthening your ability to self-protect. It is within you already but often just needs to be woken up!