13 Things that Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
Some of us can be spirited away by a breath of wind. Others seem to withstand a tornado. Even with a contorted face, these people still standing. What do they do differently? What can we learn from them?
What distinguishes those who take the blows of fate from those who fight?
They have different habits, and they deal differently with their feelings and thoughts. Here are my thoughts on the 13 habits of strong personalities.
# 1 Don’t waste time feeling pity for yourself
Even compassion brings us to a place of caring and healing — a hospital for the soul. Pity is a ticket to the valley where everyone screams, “Why me?” Self-pity makes us dwarves. Self-compassion makes us grow, learn from experience, maybe even emerge with gratitude. So, “Okay, let’s go on” instead of “Oh God, I’ve never been so bad as anyone. I’m the trash can of the universe!”
# 2 Don’t give up
Don’t blame the boss, not the partner, not the child, for making you feel bad. And, also don’t think you are much better than others. You are where you have to be, just pull yourself together — you always have the chance to start again.
# 3 You are not afraid of change
It is not easy. But it isn’t worth stopping either. The change. What can we do? Open your arms as best you can, despite the worries that the brain may be producing. The eyes open for what is around, and the heart is waiting for what may come. Yes, we still get wet, but we ride the waves.
# 4 Don’t waste energy on things beyond your control
What value is it to us if we complain about the tough traffic, the broken dishes, the pain in the leg, or about the people who behave differently than we would have liked? It is as if we were sitting in the rocking chair: it moves us, but it takes us nowhere. If you frequently find yourself worrying about different things, try to find solutions. Can you change a situation for the better? For example, you have a whole mountain of assignments to be done in three days. That is an issue you can actually manage. Just go to the https://an-essay.com, and experts will take care of the rest. Sometimes, there’s much ado about nothing.
# 5 Don’t try to please everyone
It would be nice if we all were liked, loved, cherished by others. But they don’t and never will. And most of us out there don’t care anyway, and there are so many minor characters in your play, after all. Then what is the point of trying to impress them by becoming yes-sayers? Mentally strong people act the way they really are. They stand up for what is important to them and endure the criticism, but sometimes they stay seated and leave the stage to others.
# 6 Don’t be afraid of calculated risks
No idiotic risks, no jumps from the roof, because maybe you are the only person who can fly. But those that we thought about beforehand, that we thought carefully about. What’s the worst thing that can happen? And does it outweigh the good that can happen?
# 7 Don’t lose yourself in the past
Our story belongs to us. Knowing it well means knowing ourselves. We just shouldn’t get lost in the past like a person who invented the time machine, but unfortunately didn’t take it with him on his journey to the Middle Ages and then stuck there and had to fight all the dragons. Our energy is best kept here and now. It is the only place where we can forgive, be happy, decide, and act.
# 8 Don’t make the same mistakes again
We have to make some mistakes several times until we have mastered them. Several times, but not infinitely often. “It is crazy to do the same thing over and over again and to expect a different result,” as Einstein said. Maybe the next partner shouldn’t be a brutal drunkard, the next job shouldn’t eat 80 hours a week, and the next nanny shouldn’t have a compulsive tendency to be naked. Mistakes are good and important, but only if we learn from them. The crucial question is: what can I do better next time?
# 9 Don’t resent other people’s success
Yes, there are one or a thousand or a million people who have what we long for. Then we can exercise jealousy, envy, and resentment. Or, we can try another approach — learn to be inspired by them, do good deeds, develop our personalities, and use our energy for the fulfillment of our dreams.
# 10 Don’t give up after the first failure
If people only learned to walk in adulthood, most of us might be in a wheelchair — because, unlike children, we give up far too often. “I fell once, and it hurt, I’m not going to try it again!” Every attempt brings us closer to our goal (if we learn from it).
# 11 Don’t be afraid of being alone
We should all spend some time alone. It doesn’t have to be in the forest at night. We just hear our inner voice better in the silence. And only in silence can we find what we are mostly looking for: deep happiness and friendship with ourselves. If we master this art, we will free ourselves from superficial goals and from being too dependent on others.
# 12 Don’t think the world owes you anything
The world owes us only six letters — chaos. Life itself shouldn’t meet our expectations. If so, it is we who have to put the puzzle pieces together and find meaning in that disorder. And only we are responsible for what we can do with our time, our skills, and our goals.
# 13 Don’t expect immediate results
No master has ever fallen from the sky, and if he did, he died on impact. Anything that is worth something is also worth being patient for. Leave the quick ways aside and go right through your path — day by day, step by step. That takes strength, but it also makes us strong because we really make progress.
And, I add # 14 — you can accept help. Don’t be ashamed that people need people. We often cannot influence how severe the suffering is. But we can always change the way we wear them.
