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We are faced with many extremes in our life that c We are faced with many extremes in our life that can feel contradictory or hypocritical. The more we try to fit things, people, and ideas into one box vs. the other, the more we limit our potential and understanding of something bigger and more complex. A binary, black-and-white decision does not truly exist. You may have values that make your ability to make a decision much easier because you're viewing the decision through the lens of your beliefs, but that does not inherently make the decision right, wrong, good, nor bad. Our brains desire control because it makes us feel safe (because your fundamental goal is to survive, safety is supreme). When we limit ourselves to the seeming simplicity of yes or no, right or wrong, good or bad.. we are also creating internal frustration for ourselves. Black-and-white thinking creates a power struggle in us between control and freedom. If we believe something can only be white or black, we will subconsciously pressure ourselves to fit into one of two boxes as well. As soon as you shift your perspective to believe in an á la carte system and be a free thinker, you simultaneously free yourself from a cage you didn't know you were in. The same way the more you judge others, the more you judge yourself and vice versa, the more you expect external things to remain binary, the more you will expect yourself to as well. Remember nuance. Don't forget you can make a decision without influence. Ask yourself what you believe, how you want to dress, the most fun way you could make money, and what you find inherently beautiful and interesting if no one cared about the answer except you. If nothing mattered... who are you?
We looked at each other last night and said, "Well We looked at each other last night and said, "Well this is weird" as we sat in theater # 23. 23 years ago we were in another theater as often as we could be. We called our group of friends the Sunday Night Movie Gang. SNMG. And now, on a Monday, we were back. The movie: the last installment of Johnny Knoxville's legacy. It began when I knew him. And it ended when I knew him again. I didn't think about the synchronicity of the first movie we watched being a sequel from the early 2000s. Up on the screen it said, "Best and Last", and I squeezed his hand. Cuz that's us, too.
An excerpt from my 2nd book ⤵️ "We got a taste of An excerpt from my 2nd book ⤵️ "We got a taste of loving ourselves, but on the way there we started being shown all these tools, tips, and trades we could buy and try. We’ve been sold the idea that self-help is fixing ourselves instead of loving ourselves. When did this happen? When did we switch over? We didn’t notice. It came in like a wave during the night, under a cloak of benevolence. We all thought we were helping ourselves and each other with all these inspirational quotes and affirmations. We thought we were boosting each other up, but we were all after the next fix. The next fix of dopamine and the next way we could fix ourselves. We came here because we were so down after being told we needed to be fixed and when that wave came in, we claimed a new role. We decided we would be a new type of duality. We would be both broken and the fixer. We would have a new type of kink where we take control of the thing that hurt us so much. Instead of waiting for the next person to tell us we needed to be fixed, we would learn about all our own broken pieces more than anyone ever had before. We would pick up every broken piece and examine them with a magnifying glass with all these tools and techniques we paid for from gurus and people on the internet we never met and who would never know our names or stories. If someone came at us telling us we needed to be fixed we already knew. Here is my broken outline A-Z. I’ve done the analysis and I’m working on it all day every day. You can’t touch me, because I’m fixing myself. Instead of radically loving ourselves, we just took control of a self-torture button." - Mary England
At BJs this evening I met a duck. His name is Fun At BJs this evening I met a duck. His name is Fung. He has a wonderful head of hair, blue bib/collar, patterned diaper, and a very thick tail. I love him. He is so hot right now. #ducksaresohotrightnow
The way I can tell I am depressed is I run out of The way I can tell I am depressed is I run out of myself. I forget who I am and how to be her. The way I can tell I have a purpose bigger than depression is that when I forget how to be myself, I get depressed. Because I miss and love who I am and what she can do for this world. The fear of losing her is the biggest one. Not of death, but of unfulfilled potential.
It feels like a movie. 💛 It feels like a movie. 💛
Frivolous doesn't just mean finances. It's whenev Frivolous doesn't just mean finances. It's whenever you don't understand something or judge that someone is different than you in a way that makes you uncomfortable-- especially because you are WORRIED what they're saying is true. Years ago, someone gave me an entrepreneurial challenge from ashley.beaudin . It was to write something about-- being an entrepreneur -- what someone has said about you that you disagree with. And if you had to cross it out, what you would call it instead. The word came to me almost immediately. But it took me hours, through writing, to figure out why this was a problem for me, let alone something I could rewrite. I have been called frivolous so many times. I'm aware that we have a .02 second window to make a first impression. And that I dress so colorfully and silly that it's difficult for strangers to take me seriously. Sometimes it makes me want to lead with my education, experience, and credentials. But at my core -- I know if you're willing to discard me and what I have to say because of how I look that you're not ready to hear it. (And I will be here when you are.) But I am not frivolous. I am extra. I am a lot. But just because I care about something others don't. Just because I am educated in things that others aren't. Being extra isn't bad. I would rather care than not. The opposite of the assumption made about me is: I am not frivolous, I am creative. I am eccentric. I am a seeker. I am part of the people who don't take things at face value. Who see the weird and don't dissociate from it, but attempt to ask why. Who seek. Who don't care what others think, even though we love others deeply. I am something that was once revered. And I will continue to have a deep admiration, respect, and devotion to myself first. Above all.
i was never good at following rules i was never good at following rules
When I was a kid I had a black thumb. Actually I s When I was a kid I had a black thumb. Actually I still do. My dad came up with an alternative. He told me I could have a rock garden. I said that wasn't a thing! He said it was in Japan. 🪨 So I would go outside and water my rocks that I collected on walks and at the park. What if you made a wish garden? 🪴
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